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Toons of the World, Start Your Engines!

Posted by Sir Max on August 29, 2017 at 9:00 AM

It's been quite some time since I was able to write a post about my adventures in Toontown, but with all of this Toon Trooper work dying down, I'm able to put my focus back on what my job is supposed to be: Running the Toontown Blog. Sir Max is BACK, baby!

Now let's talk Driver Safety.

Sir Max presents his car, with Hawkheart whispering to Mustavo: 'You took his keys, right?'

Don't give me the "You stink!" eye. I know I've not been the best driver in the past, but I'm a changed Toon! And by changed Toon, I mean that the Toon Council mandated that I write a lesson on Driver Safety or else I'd be suspended from Goofy Speedway. Oof.

Some of you may be thinking "Well, who cares? Goofy Speedway doesn't have much to do." My dear doubtful Toons, you must not have heard about The Grand Prix and Racing Leaderboards! That's right -- coming in Toontown's next update, Goofy Speedway is getting all sorts of fixes along with these features.

The Grand Prix is a new upcoming weekly event here in Toontown, occurring every Monday, where Toons can enter a three course racing tournament for massive amounts of tickets! Better yet -- Goofy Speedway will be hosting a Grand Prix Week at the launch of this new event, which means Toons can race in the Grand Prix as much as they want for an entire week when this update is released!

The Grand Prix also allows Toons to receive the final racing trophy, which grants the legendary 137th Laff Point for the first time ever. Who will be the first Toon to claim that prize?

Oh, and about those leaderboards. You know, the one I crashed into a few years back? They're all fixed up! Toons can compete for the top racing time to get their name on the leaderboard.

Now, back to driver safety. I hope you're ready to take some notes, because this stuff is extremely important. Here are Sir Max's Rules of Racing:

  1. Inspect tunnels for dripping paint as you draw near. Toons have been known to crash their cars into tunnels painted onto walls, known as the "Roadrunner effect."
  2. Whenever eating and driving during a Battle race, make sure all banana peels are discarded out the window. Failing to litter your banana peels is just a missed opportunity for a good gag.
  3. If a sign tells you to stop, make sure to listen to it or else it'll be very upset. I ignored a sign who asked me to stop and it started yelling some rather un-Toony words at me.
  4. Remember your traffic signals: Red means STOP, green means GO, and yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON THE BREAKS.
  5. No diving in the car pool lane unless a lifeguard is on duty.
  6. When driving through quiet neighborhoods, it's mere politeness to roll down your windows, throw on some shades, and crank up your bass to max volume while be-bopping to the Toontown Hop. Everyone stares at you in adoration!

The Goofy Speedway enhancements aren't here quite yet, but never fear -- these activities are in final testing and will be released to Toontown as quick as you can get that 300 racing wins trophy! Don't worry, I'm kidding! Youch, that one hit home.

This update is so massive that we're splitting the posts up into multiple days leading to its release. Check back tomorrow for another blog post with details about Toontown's biggest update yet!

Comments

Sorry! Comments are closed.

Eevee said on August 29, 2017 at 9:03 AM
SO HYPED! Cant wait for this update!

Autumn's Last Leaf said on August 29, 2017 at 9:03 AM
OMG YESS

Professor Control said on August 29, 2017 at 9:09 AM
Wow! Step four is funny! "...and yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON THE BREAKS." It gets me EVERY time! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Andrea said on August 29, 2017 at 9:11 AM
Awesome! You all have come so far! ^_^ Excitement fills the air. :-) Thank youuuuuuu!! :3

CaptainPow said on August 29, 2017 at 9:12 AM
Glad to see TTR making it look like a sequel to TTO with all the same stuff coming soon and new things coming.

Boo Boo Crunchynugget said on August 29, 2017 at 9:14 AM
Can't wait for the fixed racing!

Magnus said on August 29, 2017 at 9:19 AM
So hyped!!!! Who may be the first to earn the legendary 137 laff?

Professor Finkly said on August 29, 2017 at 9:20 AM
YUS, new update! 2.0.0 here we come!!

Superduck said on August 29, 2017 at 9:21 AM
Great job TTR team! Now we have the benefit of having a game like TTO

said on August 29, 2017 at 9:26 AM
thank you, sir max!!

Spike said on August 29, 2017 at 9:43 AM
WOO! Can't wait!

Hoshi said on August 29, 2017 at 9:43 AM
OMG YEY!! Soo hyped!! :D

Sea Buttercup said on August 29, 2017 at 9:46 AM
Omg, I can't wait, can this update come quicker?! Also, I really laughed at "Red means stop, green means go, and yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM THE BREAKS"

Chester Nuttynose said on August 29, 2017 at 9:50 AM
Funniest Blog Post Ever!! =)

lol said on August 29, 2017 at 9:50 AM
Nice

Caffey said on August 29, 2017 at 9:52 AM
YESSSS, I NEEDED THAT LEADER BOARD!

Flora Fuschiafluff said on August 29, 2017 at 9:54 AM
HYPE! HYPE! HYPE!

Super Wilbur Biggensticks said on August 29, 2017 at 10:02 AM
Can't wait to start playing again :)

Giggles Razzleberry said on August 29, 2017 at 10:02 AM
Awesome! Thank you TTR! You guys are working really hard! <3

Deputy Skipper Blubbersocks said on August 29, 2017 at 10:06 AM
Wow, people can actually max their toon! And I bet everyone has fallen for the roadrunner effect many times... ouch.

Star LemonFluff said on August 29, 2017 at 10:15 AM
So Excited. Ty Sir Max and the TTR Team! <3

Star LemonFluff said on August 29, 2017 at 10:16 AM
So Excited! TY SIR MAX AND THE TTR TEAM! <3 :3 ^>^

Amy (The Cat!) said on August 29, 2017 at 10:18 AM
Omg! Your fixing the goofy speedboat glitch? YES!!!!! And you can finally get 137 laff? DOUBLE-YES!!

Fuzzysocks said on August 29, 2017 at 11:24 AM
Wowzers, is this gonna be a great update or what??

Buddy The Legend said on August 29, 2017 at 11:25 AM
Can't wait for the new update it's gonna be awesome!

kirby said on August 29, 2017 at 11:32 AM
I'm so excited for the new update :D

said on August 29, 2017 at 11:37 AM
I can not WAIT!!

Captain Ricky said on August 29, 2017 at 11:45 AM
I may not be too good at racing, but I'm excited for the update! Keep up the Toontastic work! And for other people: ARE YOU TOON ENOUGH FOR THIS NEW UPDATE? I know I am.

Toon said on August 29, 2017 at 11:46 AM
Well, I'm glad to see these finally coming into TTR! Hope someday soon, we may get new race tracks and new trophies. I'd like to see new trophies based on Goofy Speedway's tracks.

Citrus said on August 29, 2017 at 11:54 AM
I do rule #6 everyday.

Dylan Da Toon said on August 29, 2017 at 11:56 AM
OMG OMG OMG!

Captain Gus said on August 29, 2017 at 11:59 AM
Toon Town will rain with joy once again, let us shout in HOORAY !

Carrots said on August 29, 2017 at 12:03 PM
I can't wait for this update!

CrazySaltyGigglemouth said on August 29, 2017 at 12:17 PM
IM EXCITED

Dr. Olly Axin Free said on August 29, 2017 at 12:26 PM
WOOT! OH YEAH, HONEY BUNCHES OF OATS! :3

Dr. Finn Wildboing said on August 29, 2017 at 12:27 PM
so cool! i cant wait to see this update!

Little Donut said on August 29, 2017 at 12:39 PM
I JUST SAW A YELLOW TRAFFIC SIGNAL AHHHHH!!!!!!

Leo Squiggletoon said on August 29, 2017 at 12:45 PM
I wonder how close we are if you're doing one everyday. also FLOOR IT

Orange Cat said on August 29, 2017 at 12:46 PM
This Update will be great

Obi said on August 29, 2017 at 12:46 PM
i know what that means i get to go raecing yay or toontastic form: Ob too: toontown thank you toontown :) <3

Cheesecake Maria said on August 29, 2017 at 12:49 PM
137 Laff hype everybody!! Woohoo!

Noah said on August 29, 2017 at 12:57 PM
Will the mac audio bug be fixed in toontown 2.0?

Poppy said on August 29, 2017 at 1:01 PM
So excited for the new update. Cracked up at all of the hilarious driving tips!

Miss Halloween said on August 29, 2017 at 1:03 PM
Boogity boogity boogity toons, lets go racing!

nice bear said on August 29, 2017 at 1:09 PM
cant wait for 2.0 this week

Loony Toon Jr. said on August 29, 2017 at 1:17 PM
This is going to be epic. Ride like the wind and leave everyone in the dust.

Aelita said on August 29, 2017 at 1:32 PM
Should I give the "You stink!" eye? No it is a joke. Ha ha ha ha! Funny.... or not. Welp, I just can't wait! Good luck to the TTR Staff on doing the update!

Tom Dizzytwist said on August 29, 2017 at 1:39 PM
This is AWSOME. I have no words. I cannot wait for that update.

Terrance said on August 29, 2017 at 1:45 PM
Awesome! I can't wait for this update!

Fluffy Sparklesprinkles said on August 29, 2017 at 1:46 PM
EXCITED!!!!

Kiki said on August 29, 2017 at 1:49 PM
SWEET!! I can't wait for the new update. I'm so excited!!

Prof. Redcat said on August 29, 2017 at 1:52 PM
I can finally get my final laff! so excited!

May said on August 29, 2017 at 1:56 PM
I am so excited! Wait does this mean I don't have to apply for a driver's license at Toon Hall? SWEET! And I don't have to wait in line for 3 hours in DWV (Department of Wacky Vehicles)??? AWESOME! But wait, can I go into the car pool lane if I bring water wings?

Loud Thunderchomp said on August 29, 2017 at 2:08 PM
"When driving through quiet neighborhoods... Everyone stares at you in adoration!" yeah, if adoration means side-eyed glances of frustration haha, I feel like this is a direct reference to what many people do in real life, and I think we all know there's no adoration there x'D

Fidget Spinner said on August 29, 2017 at 2:12 PM
OMG!!! 137 LAFF IS BACK, BABY!!11!!!11!!1

Squeaky Megabubble said on August 29, 2017 at 2:16 PM
Ya Professor Control Step Four Is Funny PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAMON THE BREAKS. XD

Miss Holly Cheezyscooter said on August 29, 2017 at 2:31 PM
OMG I cant wait!

new joaquin said on August 29, 2017 at 2:49 PM
oh my pie

Mousy said on August 29, 2017 at 3:08 PM
Yayy!! Can't wait, you guys are doing great! :)

Lady Feathermuffin said on August 29, 2017 at 3:20 PM
Glad to hear Racing is getting a fix! I raced once, and clipped RIGHT through the wall and off the track. Didn't do any more racing after that XD Maybe now I can have another try!

Connor said on August 29, 2017 at 3:36 PM
Can't wait for the new update!

Sheriff Jimmy said on August 29, 2017 at 3:47 PM
Step four, Yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON BRAKES

Super Zany said on August 29, 2017 at 3:50 PM
I'm just like Stalking the blog until 2.0 comes out

Chicken said on August 29, 2017 at 4:05 PM
Thank you!

The Powerful Donkey said on August 29, 2017 at 4:06 PM
Yes!

Little Yippie Jingletail said on August 29, 2017 at 4:14 PM
Awesome! Thank you!!

Captain Rollie Jumblemarble said on August 29, 2017 at 4:21 PM
HAHA WAY TO GO SIR MAX

Lady Chelsella said on August 29, 2017 at 4:21 PM
I'm so excited for this new update ! Thank you ttr staff for working so hard to bring us this new update !! Soo appreciated ??

Ruff Times said on August 29, 2017 at 4:23 PM
I can't wait till the newest update!!! SO HYPED!!! :D

Ruff Life said on August 29, 2017 at 4:23 PM
Let's go! I'm so excited!

Mister J.C. (Laff 119) said on August 29, 2017 at 4:28 PM
YES!!! Its about time!!! Wait will there be new Racing Goggles for us in the Catalog soon? Cause I don't want another Cata-Dog into the fixed up Racing Sign.....

Amethyst said on August 29, 2017 at 4:33 PM
Ayyy, all those 136 laffers i see can fnally be maxed.

Blossom said on August 29, 2017 at 4:34 PM
It's about cars this time!

Twilight said on August 29, 2017 at 4:37 PM
I'm hyped lol cant wait!

Davey said on August 29, 2017 at 4:38 PM
Floor it or slam on the breaks, love it. Thanks for the post, looking forward to the update.

King Gus said on August 29, 2017 at 4:41 PM
THE LEGENDARY LAFF POINT IS HERE

Grumbleson said on August 29, 2017 at 4:43 PM
I absolutely love these driving tips, but I think you missed the all-important rule number 7: Never forget to floor it when you enter a cog headquarters, and be sure to have an arsenal of toons prepared to throw pies and cakes as you drive by.

Melanie (85 laff) said on August 29, 2017 at 4:44 PM
TY SIR MAX IM SO EXCITED

Cookie said on August 29, 2017 at 4:52 PM
This Update Is Gonna Be Amazing :D Toontown Is Gonna Be Fantastic!

Silly Pepperdoodle said on August 29, 2017 at 4:53 PM
I can't wait! This is going to be amazing!

Star Featherpow said on August 29, 2017 at 4:53 PM
I'm super excited for TTR to move out of beta! Rule 4 of racing made me laugh. xD

Whiskerpaws said on August 29, 2017 at 4:54 PM
Wow! This is the best update for Goofy's Speedway!

Moe or Orson said on August 29, 2017 at 4:54 PM
I'm so excited for this update, I'll be able to get 137! I'll try to be one of the first 10 people to do so.

Frisky said on August 29, 2017 at 5:16 PM
Awesome! Can't wait for the update! Thanks so much TTR Staff! :D

Eddie said on August 29, 2017 at 5:26 PM
WOOP WOOP! THIS IS THE HITTING POINT OF TTR!

Flip said on August 29, 2017 at 5:28 PM
YAY! I'm so excited for this! :D

Savannah Sunrise said on August 29, 2017 at 5:37 PM
Your driving tips are very helpful. Thank you, Sir Max, for providing us some guidelines for the road.

Blue Bunny said on August 29, 2017 at 5:47 PM
Holy Mackeral! That's it.

Hot Sauce said on August 29, 2017 at 5:55 PM
I knew it was coming! I never gave up on the team. 137 laff is getting closer and closer.

Spring Leaf said on August 29, 2017 at 6:13 PM
LOL, I like the description for what to do at a yellow light. Very relatable.

Eris The Goddess said on August 29, 2017 at 6:53 PM
I love these blog posts :'D they're so creative and funny. GG TTR Team! Can't wait for these amazing updates :D

Mr Mc Bumble Splat said on August 29, 2017 at 7:57 PM
Can't wait! I'm super duper silly excited!

Miss Lovey Dove said on August 29, 2017 at 8:33 PM
Oh dear oh deary "yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON THE BREAKS." Everyone should know you just slwo down...

SUGA said on August 29, 2017 at 8:45 PM
"Red means STOP, green means GO, and yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON THE BREAKS." This one got me. xD

Tiny G said on August 29, 2017 at 9:54 PM
I can't wait! I'm ready to start racing again. Hopefully they fix golf next!

Scout said on August 29, 2017 at 10:43 PM
As Darrel Waltrip says, "Boogity, boogity, boogity! let's go racing!"

rainyalether said on August 29, 2017 at 11:09 PM
We need mounts (cars) that help us get to places on the streets and they cost one jellybean to use each time. Like that would be amazing!

Captain Tricky said on August 30, 2017 at 1:48 AM
Are you all Tooned-Up and ready to earn the legendarry 137 Laff? I know I'm Toon Enough. I can't wait for these new updates to come out! I also want to thank the Toontown Rewritten staff for working so hard to keep this game running for us. It really means a lot to have our old Tooniverse back. Keep up the hard work and I wish everyone the best of luck getting the legendary 137 Laff Point boost.

Crabby said on August 30, 2017 at 2:48 AM
Well im so hyped for everything new but where are the parties i wish it can be out soon!

little booboo said on August 30, 2017 at 3:56 AM
WOOO HOOO :D

Sir Rover said on August 30, 2017 at 4:37 AM
Finally, but I really don't think I'm getting 137 any time soon.

Wilbur Funnypop said on August 30, 2017 at 6:26 AM
Im very excited for the update!

Fluffy Bunny said on August 30, 2017 at 6:43 AM
YAS! Im super hyped about this! Thank you all for putting so much effort into this! I bet all of the toons are excited for a new update! I also love step four: Red means STOP, green means GO, and yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WHETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON THE BREAKS XD. The moment has come for toons to earn their 137th laff boost. Toons of the world unite!!!! C:

Skinny Goopy said on August 30, 2017 at 7:26 AM
I love rule number 4 too. looool I would floor it

Lacey said on August 30, 2017 at 7:39 AM
I LOVE TOONFEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DONT LEAVE ME CAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M COMING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bubbles said on August 30, 2017 at 7:41 AM
OMG TTR GOING TO UPDATE TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT TO GO TO TOONFEST!!!!!!!!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Blossom said on August 30, 2017 at 7:43 AM
Let's have FUN, Toons and fly to ToonFest!!!!!!!!!! The update is TOMORROW!!!!!!!!! Who's excited?!?! (I HOPE MY TOONS WON'T GET DELETED. IF THEY GET DELETED. I WILL CRY SO BAD FOR REAL.)

Wubba Ducky said on August 30, 2017 at 7:57 AM
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Weird Cricket said on August 30, 2017 at 8:03 AM
Floor it, or slam on the breaks, that is the question.

cool dog said on August 30, 2017 at 8:03 AM
cool

Captain Mac Fizzlehopper said on August 30, 2017 at 10:18 AM
rule #4 is pretty accurate to what a lot of human drivers do, which makes it even funnier. And I don't care what the stop signs say. I'm not listening to them OR their cog-words! it's a Speedway after all. What fun is stopping?

Popcorn said on August 30, 2017 at 11:57 AM
Ok now IM EXCITED!!!!!!!

Midnight Blossom said on August 30, 2017 at 3:38 PM
So cool :D

Good Ol' Lucky Zippendoodle said on August 30, 2017 at 5:03 PM
This Is Sweet! I Cant Wait To Challenge People Against Peaches!

Ned Sourfuddy said on August 30, 2017 at 5:17 PM
When I read the racing rules, I cracked up at number three. I wonder what Sir Max's confrontation with the sign looked like.

Buddy said on August 30, 2017 at 6:42 PM
I am stoked for this.

Jinxtoon said on August 31, 2017 at 8:36 AM
Yes! Goofy Speedway is a fun place, but now it will be even better! How about a round of applause for our hard working TTR staff? (CLAPS LOUDLY)>>> :) <3

Barney Wondersnout said on August 31, 2017 at 2:41 PM
Awesome!!! Can't wait!

snowflake fluffy paws said on August 31, 2017 at 2:43 PM
OMG SO EXI

Taco bella` said on August 31, 2017 at 4:51 PM
WHEN is this update??

Billy Corgan said on August 31, 2017 at 5:19 PM
#4 and #6 tho

Mr. McSnouser said on August 31, 2017 at 6:04 PM
Your driving rules for yellow basically explained my whole entire town.

Rosebud said on August 31, 2017 at 6:14 PM
This post made my day! Halarious! "Yellow means PANIC AND DECIDE WETHER TO FLOOR IT OR SLAM ON THE BREAKS" Thank you :'D I liked all of them, really. So funny! <3

Mephiles said on September 1, 2017 at 5:12 AM
If you can't wait for TTR v2.0.0, then just go to sleep until it comes out. if that doesn't work, (I know it didn't for me) then go play ToonTown Rewritten till servers go down for the update!

said on September 1, 2017 at 3:12 PM
YEAH! Can't wait to actually want to race again! It was super fun back in the TTO days (though I still remember it being... a bit buggy back then too).

sir thunderwoof said on September 1, 2017 at 6:53 PM
this is so funny

Coraldog said on September 1, 2017 at 9:22 PM
BOOYAH I CAN'T WAIT FOR V2.0

Fluffy said on September 1, 2017 at 9:50 PM
I can't be the only one who saw the title and thought START YOUR ENGINES, AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN

~Ravenstar~ said on September 3, 2017 at 10:38 AM
I'm laughing at yellow. LOL

Cool Pinky said on September 3, 2017 at 11:19 AM
Yes!!!! I'm so happy racing is fixed!! By the way, love the safety tips, Sir Max!! Especially # 6!!

Little Lily Purple splat said on September 3, 2017 at 11:31 AM
This article is so exciting! Thanks Sir Max

Frosty said on September 4, 2017 at 10:09 AM
yessss racing and grand prix

Silly Hazel Sourbop said on September 4, 2017 at 4:17 PM
Wow! This is so new. I will be liiiikkkiiinnngg it.
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