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Our Reputation Must be On "Point"

Posted by The Back Stabbers on March 15, 2020 at 2:00 PM

Good afternoon, Toons. Unfortunately, our shipment of the newly-printed “Extortion is the Best Solution” books, written by Your Honor, have been misplaced by a group of fellow Back Stabbers. The books were reportedly last seen disrespectfully being used as kindling at Open Fire Chestnut Roasting. As a result, operations in Lawbot Headquarters have been set back many days. The Chief Justice has now ordered all Back Stabbers to take to the streets throughout the Ides of March to settle these debts that you Toons now owe us.

The Back Stabbers aren't happy!

Not only are we Back Stabbers equipped to force you Toons to cease gag-manufacturing and Cog-busting, but we have intimidation tactics in place for all that do not cooperate (see Chapter 3: “Going Wild with Blackmail”). You will not be able to hide from our back-stabbing armies. This is what you Toons would call a “Back Stabber Mega-Invasion.”

Our reputation as valuable assets to the Lawbot master plan are in jeopardy. You should feel guilty, and as such, comply with each and every demand. Don't even think about bringing in the Toon Resistance. If your library has a copy of the “Extortion is the Best Solution” collection, we will accept it in exchange for the “Bribery is a Form of Flattery” collection. We have extra copies.

Sincerely,
The Back Stabbers


Comments

Sorry! Comments are closed.

Barney Wondersnout said on March 15, 2020 at 2:25 PM
OOO!! Toons of the world unite and stuff!!

Cowser the Koopahog said on March 15, 2020 at 2:39 PM
Call me crazy, but I might read those books. For research, obviously.

Mr. Toon said on March 15, 2020 at 3:02 PM
Toons of the world, let's break the law!

Twas Brillig said on March 15, 2020 at 5:21 PM
Beware the Ides of March!

Dewdrop the Dragon said on March 15, 2020 at 7:13 PM
Well I can say your book was pretty good. Pretty good for roasting marshmallows over, ha!

Jake Cheesey Marble said on March 15, 2020 at 9:06 PM
Who is that toon peeping?

Prof Rainbow said on March 15, 2020 at 9:41 PM
What a fun article!! And sorry not sorry backstabbers :)

Dr. Finn Wildboing said on March 16, 2020 at 5:04 AM
well, that cant be good

Ducky said on March 16, 2020 at 6:49 AM
Oh no!

goofy goober (104) said on March 16, 2020 at 6:50 AM
you guys should make a resistance tracker or something but This is great!

Mac said on March 16, 2020 at 11:22 AM
YAY pies

Bluesette said on March 16, 2020 at 12:26 PM
Watch your back fellow toons...

Spike the Dog said on March 16, 2020 at 1:31 PM
Bring it ooon buster I got Trucks now!!!

Weird Curly Megaquack said on March 16, 2020 at 3:48 PM
Honestly, with all the libraries closed, "Extortion is the Best Solution" might be the most fascinating reading material I get for a while. Sigh. . . at least then we would know the mind of our enemy.

Doctor Sally Twinkleswirl said on March 16, 2020 at 9:48 PM
Think again, guys. We'll never surrender to cogs like you!

Funny Dude said on March 17, 2020 at 5:09 AM
Was an interesting invasion.

alphafable said on March 17, 2020 at 7:10 AM
hasn’t this been done before?

xxwilliamxx said on March 17, 2020 at 1:53 PM
wow

Milly said on March 18, 2020 at 11:17 AM
I feel bad I'm going to play

Big Giggles Snifflehopper said on March 19, 2020 at 12:50 PM
Well, that book was really good for a campfire! But I need sticks for marshmallows. These Back Stabber heads should do.

Paranormal Parrot said on March 20, 2020 at 2:46 PM
Here we go again

Croc-O-Dile! said on March 20, 2020 at 4:33 PM
Ha ha, silly lawbots! We will never comply to your demands!
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